Let’s Just Split It: A Lesson in Dating Etiquette

Who should pay on the first date?

It's a question that crops up time and time again.

Traditional types will shout 'til blue in the face "IT’S THE MAN, IT’S THE MAN!" The idea of splitting the bill, to them, is a slap in the face and signifies the death of romance and chivalry.

Others believe that sharing the cost is a modern and mainstream way to behave.

There are others who say “it’s the person who picks that pays”. Take me to Nobu and you can damn well cover it yourself.

Most of the time, it's just a case of reading the situation and having faith that your date isn’t a freeloader.
But then again, it can go really, really wrong…

….

A friend of mine was down on her dating luck when she accepted a dinner date from a new acquaintance.

Let’s call them Jack and Jill for now.

Jill was a fairly high flying magazine journalist and absolutely LOVED to eat out on someone else’s buck.

She decided to go all out and booked a table at a fancypants Mayfair joint.

She couldn’t afford this sort of place, but was dining out on the magazine’s name so was prepared to eat like a Queen.

Arriving at the restaurant later in the week, Jill was dressed to the nines.

LBD, skyscraper heels and a feisty red gloss. Jack looked uncharacteristically smart too.

They kicked things off with champagne and worked their way through a 5 course menu.

The wine was flowing and the flirting was off the scale.

Glancing at the menu Jill was shocked at the £50-a-plate-of-pasta pricetag, but ploughed on, remembering why it was so great to eat for free.

As the meal came to a close, Jack suggested that he treat her to a nightcap around the corner.

Score.

In true journo style, they thanked the waiter profusely and left a generous tip.

Walking out of the restaurant, they were drunk and elated.

Nothing tastes better than free food.

However, just as Jill’s foot was hitting the pavement, an arm grabbed her.

One of the staff from the restaurant was waving a bill in her face.

“You have to pay, you have to pay”, he was shouting angrily. A crowd in the street was forming.

Jill tried to explain she was a reviewer, but Mauricio the waiter was having none of it.

“I’ll call the police, I swear I’ll do it."

Jill continued to explain, but they wouldn’t budge.

Looking at the £300 bill she wasn’t sure what to do. She could try and pay it now, but the question was, would her magazine cover this expense?

She glanced over at Jack for some reassurance.

"We might just have to take the hit for now," she said, attempting a chilled out laugh.

"I’m sure the office will cover it tomorrow."

Jack turned to her and shrugged for a moment.

"Listen this is embarrassing for you, I’ll leave you to it and let me know how it goes tomorrow."

He hailed a cab and bailed.

---

So what’s the takeaway here? Don’t pick pricks?

In a word, yes.

But also, don’t get money too involved in the dating process.

Expensive restaurants can be wonderful, but on the first date you don’t want to be worrying too much about who pays and how much.

Pick a good bar, wrack up a respectable tab and offer to split it.

But if they really insist, oh go on then.

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Nana is the newest addition to our Yahoo Lifestyle blogging team. She's runs a bespoke dating service called Social Concierge.