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New Mummy Blog: Preparing My Toddler For Baby Number Two

Our new mum blogger is facing a well-known parenting challenge - introducing her first born to the idea of having a baby brother or sister.

In amongst the excitement and anticipation of becoming parents for the second time, there’s another feeling creeping through: anxiety.

Yes, this was there first time around as well, but manifesting as a general niggle with various questions whirling through our minds. How would we know how to care for a newborn, would the birth go okay, will our lives change beyond recognition?

Introducing Your Oldest Child To A New Baby Is A Daunting Prospect [Yahoo]
Introducing Your Oldest Child To A New Baby Is A Daunting Prospect [Yahoo]



But this time, there’s a very big difference, and it’s toddler-shaped.

We already have a daughter, who will be 19 months when her little brother or sister is born. And one concern that is dominating our minds throughout this pregnancy is how she will react to the new arrival.

Our Biggest Worry
We’ve heard the horror stories from friends, acquaintances, our own parents, about how badly some children take it – from undiluted fury and jealousy to trying to poke the baby’s eyes out.

Honor will still be very young when it happens and we’re hoping, naively perhaps, that will work in our favour. That she won’t really understand what’s going on and will quickly come to accept the baby, not remembering a time before.

Beyond the occasional possessiveness of a toy, she’s yet to display any real signs of jealousy, so perhaps we’ll benefit from bringing number two into our family before she hits the terrible twos.

Kate Middleton Will Also Soon Be Introducing Her Toddler To Her Newborn [Getty]
Kate Middleton Will Also Soon Be Introducing Her Toddler To Her Newborn [Getty]



She certainly hasn’t grasped that there’s a new addition on the way. Beyond patting my bump like a party trick every time she hears the word ‘baby’, and wanting to lift my top up to show the world my ever-expanding stomach at inopportune moments, she shows little understanding.

And these things are more to do with her fascination of what she sees as my odd and changing body shape than what’s underneath.

Getting Prepped
But we’re still doing what we can to prepare her in advance and to ease the way for her when the new baby is here.

I’ve been reading up on how to introduce her to her new brother or sister and whether or not to bring her to the birthing centre or wait until we get home (home seems the general consensus, unless I’m in for a hospital stay of more than a night).

And of course we’ve got the obligatory present from the new baby wrapped and waiting for whenever this meeting might be. Nothing like bribery to smooth the way.

Honor Will Soon Be A Big Sister [Yahoo]
Honor Will Soon Be A Big Sister [Yahoo]



We’ve also been reading a sweet little book called There’s a House Inside My Mummy, which came highly recommended out of all the books out there to prepare older siblings in this situation and is age-appropriate for our 18-month old.

Honor likes that the mummy has a bump like mine, but really she prefers the page where the daddy and child are brushing their teeth together, so I fear she is somewhat missing the point.

We’re trying to do all we can. We also don’t want to rush her babyhood away into childhood too quickly.

We’ve bought her a big girl bed, thinking that we’d get her established sleeping in it before the baby needs the cot bed at around three months old. But, as lovely as the bed is, we’ve both been dragging our feet at actually switching Honor over into it. It’s still flat-packed, in the cupboard under the stairs at the moment.

And we tried switching her bedtime milk from a bottle to a beaker – we should probably have done this already, but we’ve got a great bedtime routine going that we didn’t want to disrupt. But we thought that if bottles became something she used to have, that she associates with babies, then it would be easier if and when she saw the new baby drinking from one.

The first night went great – she loved the beaker so much she wanted to take it into bed with her when it was finished. The second night she refused to take it. So we’re back to the bottle – not wanting to unsettle her in any avoidable way before the unavoidable change happens.

Perhaps we’re being oversensitive and this is just one more thing to add to the disparaging list of modern parenting methods that are spoiling our children, but for us, right now, we worry about how Honor will cope and if there’s anything we can do to stop her feeling like our much longed-for and loved new baby is nothing more than a mewling, red-faced usurper coming to steal her crown.

[New Mummy Blog: Pregnant With Baby Number Two]

[Kate Middleton Pregnant: Royal Baby Name And Odds On Boy Or Girl Revealed]