Dating Tips: 5 Ways To Keep A Relationship 'Real'

So it turns out that ice-cream makers aren’t just concerned with helping us get over breakups.

Or making us really chubby.

The thinkers over at Häagen-Dazs recently commissioned a report that looked at the general state of the nation’s love lives.

And it’s grim.

Apparently, one in five of us believe a relationship based on social media is as meaningful as a face-to-face one.

(Those who've seen MTV's series Catfish: The TV Show will know exactly what I'm talking about).

And one in ten would choose their phone over a partner on Valentine’s night.

Having recently made an expedition to The School of Life – London’s philosophical Mecca – I found out from a room of love experts (David Waters and Lucy Beresford) what they think is the key to making a relationship last.

In the face of psychotic social media use (guilty!) and our general addiction to smartphones, how do we keep relationships "real"?

1.    Paying Attention

It’s one thing spending time together and quite another being "present."

Think about the last time you put on a film and spent every five minutes checking Instagram, while your partner filtered their inbox.

If you’re doing something together, give it your full attention and make a bigger deal out of it. Celebrate that activity.

If it’s watching a film, buy popcorn, grab a duvet and turn your phone off.

2.    Being Together

Try spending time together in near silence.

 If you can chill in the same room without feeling the need to report back on your day and frantically fill the void, then you’re able to experience what it’s like to just be around each other.

Apparently this gives your relationship the space to "breathe."

Like wine I suppose.

3.    Simplicity

Combat negative thoughts in your relationship by stripping things back and trying to get perspective on the basic reasons you’re together.

Use memories of when you first met and chat about them together. Remind each other why you’re bothering in the first place!

4.    The Real You

We spend so much time cultivating an image of ourselves - a "best" version of who we are, that we want others to envy and marvell at.

But it isn't usually true to the real you.

The important thing about healthy relationships is that you can show your vulnerable side to your partner.

They don’t expect to see your life through a filter – and when something truly glam or exciting happens to you, it’ll wow them all the more.

5.    Spontaneity

Checking into a restaurant on Facebook when you’re on a date kind of defeats the whole point of being spontaneous and romantic.

If you’re lucky enough to have a partner who injects energy into your relationship by suggesting spur of the moment things, Just. Say. Yes.

Enjoy the spontaneity as it’s happening and whatever you do don’t let them catch you giving a play-by-play picture diary to your “followers.”

So that’s it.  Lock in, switch off and get real.

[Women Admit Their Top Regrets: What Can We Learn From Them?]

[Nude Breast Feeding Photo Is Removed From Facebook - Should It Have Been?]

For more talks about love and relationships, check out the series at The School of Life.