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Children Aren't Born Nice - It's Something They Develop

It’s the ultimate question; are we born nice, or is it something we develop?

Until now, it seemed like babies were born with an innate kindness but two psychologists may’ve discovered that, in fact, children develop the skill of being nice.

We may not be born nice, after all [Rex]
We may not be born nice, after all [Rex]



A study, conducted eight years ago, seemed to prove that children are born selfless.

The researchers found that 18-month-old children were keen to be helpful without being asked – but now two psychologists are questioning whether the outcome of the study was affected by the researchers spending time with the children for a few minutes before beginning the experiment.

With us so far?

Psychologists Rodolfo Cortes Barragan and Carol Dweck think that the researchers' interaction with the toddlers, which was simply to make them feel comfortable before starting the study, could have pushed the children towards exhibiting altruistic (selfless) behavior.

Children may learn the art of kindness from their surroundings [Rex]
Children may learn the art of kindness from their surroundings [Rex]



“Kids are always on the lookout for social cues, and this is a very prominent one,” says Barragan, the lead author on the research paper.

“Does the person's play indicate that they'll care for me? These actions communicate a mutuality, and the child responds in kind.”

To test their theory, the psychologists created a study where the 34 children they studied wouldn’t be affected by the warm-up period.  

Diving the one- and two-year-old children into two groups, the psychologists had an experimenter in one of the groups roll around a ball with a child while talking. The experimenter would then ‘accidently’ knock something over and see whether the child would pick it up.

The exact same happened in the other group, except both the child and experimenter had their own ball.
The psychologists found that the children who shared a ball with the experimenter were three times more likely to help pick up the knocked over items than the children who had their own ball.


“I think the findings will stir up some controversy, but in a good way,” says Dweck.

“People often call something 'innate' because they don't understand the kinds of subtle experiences that can make something, like altruism, flourish. Rodolfo has discovered a really subtle experience that has a powerful influence.”

Of course, more studies are needed to confirm the results, particularly in children younger than 18 months – which the psychologists are aware of.

“Following the reciprocal play, children felt a sense of trust in the other person,” says Barragan. “If children trust the people in their world, they may have an easier time learning the culture of that world – effectively making it easier for them to achieve new levels of personal and interpersonal success.”

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