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Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas split: What now?

As the Hollywood couple announce they’re ‘taking time apart’, we speak to relationship expert Kate Taylor about what course of action they and other couples should take

Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas are 'taking time apart' from their marriage [Rex]

Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas shocked the world when they announced they're separating after 13 years of marriage.

A statement from the pair’s spokesman revealed the couple were ‘taking some time apart to evaluate and work on their marriage.’

The actor couple married in 2000 and have two children together - Dylan, 13, and Carys, 10.

They’ve both had health scares in recent years, with Catherine, 43, visiting rehab for bi-polar disorder and Michael, 68, suffering from throat cancer which he says was caused by oral sex.

The couple are currently holidaying apart as they come to terms with the seemingly shock separation.

We spoke to Kate Taylor, relationship expert at Match.com, about the best course of action for the pair as they take time apart.

How can you get through a rough patch like this in a relationship?

I think what the couple are doing right now - staying apart - has the potential to be very helpful.

They admitted they spent a lot of time together during their marriage, so a break now will give them a rare opportunity to see how much they genuinely miss being in each other’s company.

I would tell Catherine not to contact Michael for a couple of weeks, especially if he (as has been rumoured) was the one to initiate the split.

A short period of silence will allow them both to assess their feelings, after the initial shock, sadness and anger have begun to fade.

Then she should wait until Michael initiates a meeting, and do everything she can be remain unemotional during that meeting. This might be a struggle as Catherine is bi-polar.

Longer term, I’d advise professional help - but Michael revealed after his first marriage ended that he no longer believes in marriage counselling.

When is it time to go your separate ways as a couple?

•    When you no longer talk, because so many topics of conversation have been deemed “No Go” areas as they only induce the same arguments.

•    When you no longer have any fun together. I thought things looked bleak for this couple when they stopped playing golf together.

•    When you use social events with friends as a time to score points against your partner, by bringing up hot-button topics.

•    When you can no longer see any way back.

•    When the couple displays open signs of contempt to each other.

How can you recover after a long-term relationship ends?

Wait. Live with your feelings, don’t try to hide them (by putting on too brave a face), squash them (with alcohol, partying or drugs), or deny them (by dating again too soon).

The faster you can reach a place of acceptance that this is how your life is now, the faster you will recover.

Unfortunately, this is usually only achieved by admitting there is no hope for a reconciliation. That can be incredibly painful, but it is ultimately what will give you the strength - and clarity - to move on.

[Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas split after 13 years of marriage, confirmed]

[Kelly Osbourne ‘co-dependent’ on fiancé Matthew Mosshart – is this a healthy relationship? Our expert reveals all]

What should you do when there’s children involved?

If you always make decisions based on, “What is best for the children?”, you will do well.

And remember that your children’s relationship with your ex-partner is COMPLETELY SEPARATE from your own relationship with your ex-partner.

Don’t try to interfere with your children’s feelings for your ex; you are not on the same side. They have the right to form their own opinion of their parent.

How can you remain friends?

Staying friends is not the ultimate goal in a split, even if there are children.

If you focus your attention on building your OWN life again, you will naturally find it easy to form a civil, stable relationship with your ex.

Don’t aim for friendship - it can be painful to try to befriend an ex when that means hearing about their new relationships.

Instead, focus on yourself. That will minimise the emotional attachment you have with your ex, and that in turn will allow you to co-parent successfully.

What are your tips for getting through a rough patch in a relationship? Tell us over on Twitter now.

[Catherine Zeta-Jones bounces back from rehab in lacy Maria Lucia Hohan gown at Red 2 premiere]

[Michael Douglas says oral sex gave him throat cancer]