Fair Trade - How NOT To Behave When Dating A Banker

I hate reducing people to professions.

But sometimes, a type is a type.

In my years as a matchmaker, I’ve often been asked to find someone a man in finance.

Sometimes, it’s because my client also has a demanding job with great earning potential.

Sometimes, it’s because they just want to go on a date at Nobu.

What does surprise me is the number of creative types who float in – hair strewn, Converse mucky – demanding a straight-laced banker with a house in Chelsea and a healthy investment portfolio.

“He/she must work out, earn 80k+ and have a property abroad.”

Right.

These characters are happy to engage in a marketplace of dating where the fair trade is their beauty and best behavior.

But playing Betty Draper for more than a few dates, well that’s tricky.

And the question remains, is this really your idea of fun?

Behaving for the Banker

Banker boys have never been my thing.

It’s not that I’m not mad into cash. I just prefer – and attract – the creative types.

However, after a couple of months with a musician who drank like a fish and wooed me with pasta bakes, I bumped into "Cityboy" on a night out.

The man in question was in his early thirties and a trader at a big bank.

On the first date, we went to a fancy cocktail bar.

It was all rather proper.

Now, my usual tactic on dates is to drink and chat relentlessly until something happens.  

This time I arrived early and briefed the barman to replace the vodka in my cocktails with cordial.

So far so sober.

The night ended with a pleasant taxi ride home and a peck on the lips.

The next date, we did dinner – nice place, great chat, one glass of wine.

Our dates would always end at 10pm sharp with a kiss and nothing more.

On our sixth date, annoyed by the slow pace of our romance, I confronted him.

“Listen, it doesn’t feel like you’re that keen. And that’s fine. Shall we just call it a day?”

Banker boy looked at me with shock.

“I don’t know what you mean. I’m utterly into you”

Surprised by his affirming response, I decided to celebrate and cut lose.

Drinks were ordered and shots were downed. For the first time on our dates, I was having real fun.

Flashforward to 2am.

We’re back at his. I’m demanding vodka and Jay Z, gyrating round his pad and shouting "dance, boy!."

He’s shushing me and telling me to keep the striptease for when we reach his room. I’m guffawing and having the time of my life.

I wake up at 8am and he’s gone. There are two notes on the pillow.

One reads, “I hope you make it to work."

The second reads, “I’m not so sure this is going to work.”

Bad Nana.

….

So what’s the takeaway here? That you have to behave like a lady at all times. F**k no.

The message here is that if you aspire to date someone who values control and impeccable manners at all times, make sure that sounds at least a little like you.

It’s one thing to put on a show to win over a date, but quite another to have to "behave" a certain way that isn't natural to you, for a long period, in order to attract a type.

If you’re looking for a love match, be you from the get-go.

And make damn sure you pick someone who can handle that.

Nana is the newest addition to our Yahoo Lifestyle blogging team. She's runs a bespoke dating service called Social Concierge.

Check out her full bio HERE.

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