Alternative Baby Milestones That Pretty Much Every Parent Experiences

We all know when a baby is ‘supposed’ to start teething, babbling, crawling and take his first step.

But what about the milestones that parents are less willing to share – and warn others about? The not-so-great ones that every parent experiences. The ones that make us realise that we’re only human. We reckon it’s time to shout about those.

Brace yourself…

The First Wee Shower
All parents of little boys will quickly realise the important of holding their son’s penis down after one, erm, delightful pee facial.

The First Explosive Poo
Up until this point, the thought of changing the cat litter probably disgusted you. You never knew a tiny baby could make this much mess. It’s pretty amazing really. Just a shame it’s a leaky one and all over your lap.

That First All-Nighter
No, we’re not talking an hour’s sleep, then an hour of being awake. We’re talking a full 12 HOURS of being awake with your baby. May as well accept it and make a dent in your Netflix account.

The First Time He Fell Over
Yes, it does happen to everyone and no, it doesn’t make you a bad parent. Just laugh if off and he will too.

The First Sick Soaking
It’s not pleasant and it’s always unexpected. But it will teach you not to wear your favourite Whistles top while holding your baby.

The First Time He Eats Something He Shouldn’t
Whether your unknowing friend absentmindedly hands your un-weaned baby a carrot stick to gnaw on or he finds and starts munching on your Tesco’s receipt, it’s going to happen at some point.

The First Time He Rolls Off The Changing Mat
No, you’re not an awful or undeserving parent – you turned your back for one second. It happens to the best of us.

The First Time He Swears
This one isn’t necessarily reserved for older children – babies have an annoying habit of picking up bad words and repeating them at precisely the wrong time. Like when the mother-in-law’s round for Sunday lunch.

The First Time He Scratches You In The Eye
OK, babies should really come with a warning sticker on them about how sharp they teeny tiny nails get! That first time you get caught while her arms are flailing around while you change her nappy is a killer. Time to invest in some baby nail scissors.

Any others to add? Let us know in the comments below.

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