It’s hard not to wonder whether the grass is greener on the other side. When you’re single, you start to crave the intimacy of a long-term relationship, where your partner understands every inch of your body. When you’re in a relationship, it’s easy to fantasise about a wild night of passion with someone you only just met.
But is it possible to rank one above the other? We’ve put together an argument for single sex and couple sex below - let us know which one you think wins the debate....
You’re free, liberated, dressed to impress and then you see a guy with a body of a Greek god across the dance floor. You’re in charge – if you want to sleep with him you can. It’s this feeling that makes single sex so exhilarating. If you’ve never been with the person, you don’t know their moves or their ‘special skills’ they could genuinely rock your world.
Plus, there’s no reason why one night stands have to be awkward and embarrassing the next day. If he wanted sex and you wanted sex (and you’re both adults!) then you both got something out of the experience. It doesn’t have to result in marriage and babies to be meaningful.
The other great thing about single sex is the ‘naughty’ factor. There’s no rules, so you can feel free to act out your wildest fantasies, talk dirty or scream the place down because who cares if the person you’ve just met judges you?
However, single sex is selfish at its core. You want a release and you’ve found someone who can provide that without having to worry about their self-esteem or their feelings in the long-term.
Plus, you’ve got to weigh up the risks. He could be harbouring a STI or he may be so awful in the sack that you want to run away screaming. This is just the chance you take with single sex....
Both men and women crave relationships. It speaks to our mating instinct, which is basically screaming at our subconscious to meet someone nice, safe and genetically acceptable to produce young.
The quality of couple sex is rooted in the connection and intimacy your have with your partner. If you’ve been with your partner for months (or years) he will know what parts of your body you like kissed, what positions you like and how to make you orgasm.
Couple sex is heightened by the sense of trust between you and your partner. You may feel more willing to try different things or play out your Fifty Shades fantasies with someone who you know has your interests at heart.
The two of you will have built up a rhythm and an intensity that suits you both – if you don’t achieve this in a long-term relationship it’s worth addressing head-on.
Getting stuck in a bad sex cycle is always a risk, but don’t underestimate the power of sleepy spooning and the ‘I love you so much it hurts’ moments. You don’t get that with a one-night romp!
Handbag HQ conclusion
It’s a tough call but we vote couple sex. Trust, intimacy and passion allow you to let go and give in to the experience completely. You’re always going to have your guard up during single sex because you’re not as in-tune with your partner....that’s why it will always be second best.
What do you think?