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    Adopting from abroad

    Yahoo Lifestyle – Thu, Dec 22, 2011 13:43 GMT


    More than 4,000 children are waiting to find a family in the UK and yet many couples need to go abroad to successfully adopt.

    [See also: Adoption by gay dads]


    In this episode of Bumps Babies and Beyond, Myleene is joined by Francesca Polini, who was forced to look abroad to adopt a child even though there were needy children in her local area.

    Her local council had put a cap on the number of black or mixed race children who could be adopted by someone of white origin.

    And because there were no white children waiting for a family, Francesca and her husband had to look elsewhere.

    They turned to Mexico where they successfully adopted a daughter Gaia, with son Luca following a few years later.

    Back in the UK Francesca feels it’s important to remind her children of their roots and brings them up to be proud of being adopted.

    See also: 

    Fitting a new arrival into the family

    Finding the best baby names

     
    • carole
      carole  •  London, England  •  4 months ago
      My husband I were accepted as prospective adoptive parents but after 5 years of waiting for a child to be placed with us we were told by our social worker that us parents are only statistic.

      Despite us saying we be happy to adopt any child of colour, disability or age, when we were only approved for a new born and every year we got older our chances were slipping because we were told we were getting too old. In the end we decided to accept life without children, But it makes me angry when they moan about not enough prospective parents when they approved and not place any.

      No wonder people go abroad to adopt our system is wrong.
      • A Yahoo! User 4 months ago
        Hi Carole I agree completely ,,We no longer live in the UK We have 3 children and spent 6 years going through the motions of trying to foster ,I am a psychologist and my husband a Commercial Manager ,we had a wonderful house and still had test after test and still until relocation to Australia were waiting ..To make matters worse we still receive letters from them they still have not taken us off the system ..mad upon mad we are a loving ordinary family whom simply wanted to give other children a family ,,,still makes me mad the pressure you go through ,, wish you all the luck Amanda x
      • Veteran
        Veteran 4 months ago
        Carole ,it's the system yes but mostly the pillocks who run it. If your face doesn't fit you've had it, and most off them in charge I wouldn't trust with my dog.
    • Kleofa
      Kleofa  •  Maidenhead, England  •  4 months ago
      Time the local councils started rethinking ,children are much better placed with full time parents,rather than being moved piller to post all there young years ,this causes low self esteem and many more issues throughout their lifes.it is also a greater benifit on finances that local gov, should make adoption more accessible time to cut red tape.Is this a third world country .It do,es not make a difference whether a child is black or whit normal people dont have this way of thinking ,get the finger out my names Kleofa I fostered over 200 children ,and seventy day care children and worked in a residental school .and have seen the outcomes .and watch as we continue to fail the children ,and the old in our own sup-child friendly country.
      • Phil
        Phil 4 months ago
        Wow... That is really hard to understand!
      • jtWallace
        jtWallace 4 months ago
        Obviously they don't care about ''self esteem'' or security for the child. Just averages or racial differences.
    • jemma
      jemma  •  4 months ago
      Being adopted always felt to me as if my whole life was a lie. People at school used to talk about which parent they looked like and I'd have to make up a story. if I ever mentioned I was adopted, people would say they're sorry. I never felt part of my adoptive family and my natural family said I was a stranger. I would never have a child and assume other people would treat them properly. I think anti abortion people are hypocrites as they care more about looking good with a banner than caring about the unwanted children they want born.
      • Ameenah
        Ameenah 4 months ago
        I happen to be adopted because my mum and dad were unable to look after me. Only difference was my family was kind and treated me as their own though we had disagreements like any other family. So I suppose it's what environment you grow up in and how much happiness you have generally in life.

        My mum was 17, she could have aborted me, but she didn't, and she still loves me even now.

        I am happy to be adopted because I was given a chance to live and have a good life. Sure you think living with your adoptive parents is the only life you have now and you'd rather be aborted, but what about the second family that you hope to have? What about other aspects of your life? You sound like a very depressed person, or just a desperate liberal trying to make a point that all adopted kids are all unhappy and unwanted - or both

        - A centrist who also happens to be also pro-choice (early abortions.)
      • shirley
        shirley 4 months ago
        My brother and sister in law spent 2 years going through the adoption process, they now have 2 beautiful children who both know that they are loved by them and all of our large family, but the process they had to go through very nearly put them off, that was 13 years ago.
      • Teresa
        Teresa 4 months ago
        I wish those who rate adoption up there with one of the best things ever would listen to the hearts and minds of those who were adopted and how it impacts. This in spite of the best of material care and love there is still a part inside which knows we are different. We can function and be happy but in the ideal world we would never have left our families. Every one always sees these sentiments as a selfish or ungrateful but neither have anything to do with it there is a parelel existance we can only wonder about. Wise adoptive parents understand this and they are the ones which give a person a good adoption experience.
    • No More Faith
      No More Faith  •  London, England  •  4 months ago
      When I was at infant school in the 1960,s whe had two adopted black children in our school. Because of a black protest nationwide they had to go and live with black parents. The black community in the UK were worried that black children wit white parents would lose their culture. This was fully supported by the Labour party. I never knew what happened to them next.
      Adoption is divided alone racial religious and culture lines. That is why despite all the bull from the media the UK is still not a multicultural country. Black people with their "Black is best" attitude killed of any attempt at such. Even though I do not have children I would not adopt a black child because of the fear I have of attack from the black community. Adoption is mainly for single mothers that cant stop drinking anyway.
    • richard
      richard  •  Bristol, England  •  4 months ago
      Ever woman is desperate for a baby. This has nothing to do with the colour of the would-be parents skin. If you read between the lines, this is probably more to do with the fact that these people want to adopt babies - not children. I think that people thinking about adoption should not worry about the age of the child. I'm positive that there are loads of white children of five or six years of age waiting to be adopted.
    • Lallal A
      Lallal A  •  Brighton, England  •  4 months ago
      Frasesca is not the only one experiencing such hurdles in the UK most Asian families face extreme difficulty and many resort to going overseas where it is very simple and quick to adopt one and then get permission for the child to accompany the parents to UK. So there is rgent need to reform the procedure.
    • David Ofosu-Appiah
      David Ofosu-Appiah  •  London, England  •  4 months ago
      Good Latino&Hispanic look-alike to her as they have similar Meditarranean features.
    • Hanzyy.Lu.x
      Hanzyy.Lu.x  •  Hemel Hempstead, England  •  4 months ago
      i would adopt anyone of those 4000 kids in our country ... that is so stupid that people are trying to do an "angelina jolie" and helping other countries out before their own.... it sickens me ... i would much rather help those poor kids being split up and shoved into umpty dozen houses than go to a third world country and take them out of their own home ....
    • ADJ
      ADJ  •  St Albans, England  •  4 months ago
      everyone should be able to adopt if they meet the criteria for giving the child the best start in life, and if the UK agencys say no you should consider why before being clever and adopting from abroad where they dont care about the childs welfare.
    • Nikki M
      Nikki M  •  Madrid, Spain  •  4 months ago
      What it tells me is that black and mixed race parents don't give a damn about the kids they produce, just the fun part of the process. when it comes to the responsibility part for their actions they do not want to know.
      • Aafiya Khalaf
        Aafiya Khalaf 4 months ago
        You clearly do not have black or mixed raced friends to make such a ridiculously generalised comment
      • Andreas
        Andreas 4 months ago
        So because there are a few black and mixed race children available for adoption how does that mean that black and mixed race people don't give a damn about their kids in general. It's a bloody ridiculous conclusions to reach. You're an idiot.
      • PHILIP
        PHILIP 4 months ago
        So your parents didn't give a damn about producing you?
    • Malcolm S
      Malcolm S  •  Peterborough, England  •  4 months ago
      She should wait until after Christmas, it'll be cheaper.
    • anon
      anon  •  4 months ago
      Just seen this article and i am shocked to find out that people are allowed to adopt children from abroad, Madonna and other so called "celebs" started this worrying trend in America, i never thought it would happen here, sadly it's just another example of people having too much money, 'cos the average person couldn't afford to go to Mexico for a holiday never mind to "adopt" a child, this practice needs stopping.
    • R h W
      R h W  •  London, England  •  4 months ago
      why couldnt she adopt a kid in her own country and bloody well stay there instead of scrounging off us with benefits
      • Maurice
        Maurice 4 months ago
        Because its full of nobwhits like yersel and deserve to be overrun. You pratt!
      • doe
        doe 4 months ago
        Half of these comments are ill informed or frankly stupid, One, she did check out her local country first, The catholic institution she was adopted from sounds like a religious orphanage, so of course she wouldnt be better off in a childrens home, it does not sound like she wanted to do the "celebrity" thing. I think half have not even watched the video! As for the gay comments one word for you, Iggnorant!
    • A Yahoo! User  •  Bolton, England  •  4 months ago
      just go round any back street in any big city anywhere in the u.k , you will be able to get a foreign child that's been smuggled in to the country for a small fee .
    • Leroy Jenkins
      Leroy Jenkins  •  London, England  •  4 months ago
      Get yourself a hamster love
    • Siobhan Delight
      Siobhan Delight  •  4 months ago
      Hey, Yahoo! I'm leaving your server. I don't want your "Pulse", because I liked the old way better and I do not want you telling everyone my location. If I want to "expand my experience" I will, but that will be on MY terms. Not yours.

      Sayonara everyone! You can bully the illiterate and meanies without me (you did that anyway.)
    • A Yahoo! User  •  4 months ago
      i didnt know we can import kebabs here without questions.
    • mahoon
      mahoon  •  Sheffield, England  •  4 months ago
      Frustrated old woman.
    • A Yahoo! User  •  4 months ago
      You don't have to spend a fortune on gifts this Christmas. Get a FREE ipad 2, iphone 4S, TV, laptop or choose from Iots of other stuff simpIy by trying out a free triaI with 1&1, Gala bingo or one of several others. Just visit simplyfree4u .co.uk

      I know of a couple who adopted from abroad after being let down by the adoption service in the UK. They fit the criteia of loving parents, both work hard, none smokers, no blemished life, both had CRB checks. The only reason given is that she was nearing her 40th birthday and was considered too old... More
    • Geff
      Geff  •  Milton Keynes, England  •  4 months ago
      Raised a family. No previous! Medical Fine. Not suitable to foster. No reason given as to why. No mortgage. Not doing it for Money. 4 Bed House. I was rejected me and my partner. Cannot understand why. Willing to give a child a future. Also to change our life style to suit.
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